Wednesday, October 2, 2013

The cup of friendship!

It was a lazy Sunday evening. The sky was colour of mustard with the clouds forming a wall of black smoke playing around the setting sun. It had stopped pouring and the earth was drenched in water spreading a pleasant smell all around the busy place. Mr. Salunke was sitting in a coffee shop on a red coloured table placed in the corner near the glass door and despondently watching people entering and leaving the place. It was painted in yellow and red, and some amazing photographs gave a captivating look to the walls. He turned his gaze towards the chair across him, lying vacant, and gasped. 

Mr Salunkhe was an aristocratic man in his late thirties. He had been sitting in the same place for about an hour now, lost in thoughts about the past. He took out his ID card and placed it on the table. It read, Mr Sachin Salunke, M.D., Sunrise corporation pvt. Ltd.

 A 23 year old guy wearing a black uniform with a red cap which had the logo of the coffee shop printed on it, approached Mr. Salunke. It was the 7th time he had come to take an order but had found no way to bring Mr. Salunke out of his reverie.

 It had again started drizzling intermittently. As a young couple entered the coffee shop, the wind brought in a few drops of rainwater which found its resting place on Mr. Salunke’s right hand. The cold water spread a sudden rush of current in his whole body and he was snapped out of his musings. He looked at the boy standing in front of him.

The boy asked- “what would you like to order sir? “
Mr Salunke replied in his state of stupor- “a cup of friendship “. The boy was bewildered by the statement and replied politely- “sorry sir, we do not serve any such beverage here, would you like to order something else? “.

 He got up with a blank look on his face and left the coffee shop. Outside, street urchins were busy playing in water and mud. Fruit and vegetable vendors carried on with their errands as usual. He was feeling a little dizzy and heavy in the head. The refreshing breeze was not helping him feel any better. For a few seconds he kept looking into vacuum and then started walking slowly.

Mr Saluke turned right and walked inside a silent narrow street that was just adjacent to the busy road bustling with cars and bikes, running in a panicky fashion. The moon was full and radiant, looking like a pearl glowing in the dark sky and giving it a colour of dazzling silver. The gentle breeze wafted with it faint smell of the flowers. The path was muddy with trees protecting it from both the sides. He could feel the softness of mud beneath his feet which drifted him away towards the memories of his past. The sweet smell from a myriad of flowers, lying crushed on the ground, made him revisit the times when he was a young and enthusiastic boy of 11.

He belonged to a small village on the outskirts of the city he was currently working in. He could still picture the whole map of his village and his childhood memories. There were about 50 families in the village and most of them earned their bread through farming or working for a daily wage.

Salunke’s father used to run a small tea shop located in the middle of the village. It was a small thatched hut with space just enough for 2 people. In front of the shop, there was a huge tree with a round concrete platform around its bark. The hut was located on the side of a road which connected the village from the city. This was a resting point for all the fellow villagers and also the place where males from the villages got together for some merriment. It was also the place where all the important issues about village were discussed. Salunke’s home was just a few minutes walk away from the shop. It was a small house made up of red bricks with a roof covered by metal sheets.

Life in the village was simple yet full of contentment but Salunke had his eyes towards the sky. A good thing, only if his feet remained on the ground.

It was the year of 1988, when “Chhotu” joined Salunke’s tea shop. He was a dark skinned, thin boy; maybe the same age as that of Salunke. He looked starved and destitute but this never failed to rob him of his vibrant smile, which went from ear to ear.

In no time, both chhotu and Salunke became friends. Salunke would share his day in school and all his lessons. Chhotu was intrigued by all that but was never envious of him. He always had the hint of tranquillity on his taut face.

Salunke taught him english during the free time. They both played in the fields until the stars emerged in the sky. The friendship and the bond kept on getting stronger with passing days.

One hot evening during the month of June, when both of them were resting under a tree after playing for hours; Salunke got to know about chhotu’s journey. Perhaps, it was the amount of love and comfort chhotu had received from Salunke and his family that overwhelmed him. Or Maybe, he just wanted to narrate his story to someone he could trust; that he could consider as his own. His story came out in one breath, all the time avoiding looking straight into salunke’s eyes.  Thereby succeeding in hiding most of his pain, otherwise reflected in his eyes.

Salunke accidentally hit a stone with his right foot and wobbled. The pain he felt by the collision was nothing compared to the amount of pain he felt because of the burden of these memories. He was feeling giddy; so he sat down on a large rock that had been lying patiently in the woods since years. He heard a noise of crumbling  leaves behind him, as someone came rushing out of the bush. He stirred violently out of fear, trying to open his eyes as wide as possible to cover the maximum view. The look in his eyes changed from horror to contempt, when he saw a young couple in their teenage coming out of the bush. He shrugged and turned his head in opposite direction. An eerie silence invaded the dark in a few minutes and Salunke again dipped into his musings.

Since the day, Azhar, for that was chhotu’s name, had shared his life with Salunke; they both felt more connected to each other. Salunke thought of Azhar as his own brother. Both, his father and his sister were happy to see them both together and dreamt of their bright future.

Years passed by, and time flew by in a blink of eye. Salunke had passed 11th class and applied for a number of colleges in the city. He was a bright student and had scored good marks. He got admission in a renowned college and started planning to leave his village for higher studies. His father was old and sick but he did not worry about him, as Azhar was there to look after him. He had also taken responsibility of the shop. Salunke’s sister had married a decent guy from surrounding village and was happily living with her new family.

He left his home and started living in the college hostel. Soon, he made new friends out there and the city life took control over him. He was engrossed in this absolutely different lifestyle but never forgot to visit his home from time to time. His father was exhilarated to see his son aspiring to do something big in his life and working hard for it. Salunke would sometimes bring his friends along to his village. All his friends knew about Azhar and their friendship. Though they tried to act normal, Azhar could sense that he was looked down upon by them. He chose not to say anything regarding it to Salunke. He thought that maybe he is getting it all wrong, and moreover, he knew that Salunke would never feel that way for him.

Time passed and after a year Salunke’s father met his end. Both Salunke and Azhar cremated their father’s body,crying  profusely.

After a few days, both of them regained their strength and moved on in life. Salunke went back to his studies and Azhar got busy with the shop. Now he was the only one left in the house. He would always tell Salunke to finish his studies and return home. It was a tough job for him to look after the property which did not belong to him. But he did not want to abandon it because it contained the memories of salunke’s father and the precious times they all had spent together in that house. On the contrary, Salunke thought of getting a suitable job in the city and settling there. He started supporting his expenses by doing a part time job in a BPO after college timings. Salunke’s visits to the village ebbed with time. He would bring his friends along most of the times and they all would drink and smoke all night. Azhar was not comfortable with it and his tolerance collapsed after he anticipated that the situation was going out of control and something had to be done about it. He spoke with Salunke and told him whatever he was doing was not right and he was disrespecting his father by allowing all these things to happen in this house.

Salunke was irritated as he thought that Azhar was crossing his limit. Infuriated by the interference, he yelled at Azhar and told him to stay away from his personal matters because he was just a mere servant who was looking after his property. Azhar was devastated by the words. He did not mind that Salunke scolded him in front of everyone but what struck him was that he was being despised by the person he loved the most. It felt as if someone was trying to pull a dagger out of his chest. The pain was trying to escape from his throat but he gulped it down. He tried to maintain his calm but spoke with grief in his voice “ Dear friend, I was a servant to your father, not you. I looked after this house because I loved him but I think, now that my beloved master is no more, I shall find a new job for me. I will resign from my work as soon as I find some other job. But if you want, I can leave as soon as possible.” He felt like he was orphaned once again. Tears managed to come out of the corners of his eyes. He turned his back towards Salunke and left the house.

Salunke was standing there, with his eyes full of shame as his face turned red. He wanted to apologize to Azhar but the presence of his friends resisted him from doing so. He felt as if his ears were on fire and his knees so numb that he would collapse on the ground any moment. The clock showed 2:00 in the morning and everybody decided to sleep. The night was long and painful for both of them.

After a month, whilst Salunke was coming out of his college after attending the classes; he saw Azhar standing in front of the gate. Their eyes met and they both smiled at each other. They shook hands, avoiding each others eyes. Salunke had already anticipated the purpose of Azhar’s visit. He asked him, if he would like to have a cup of coffee. Azhar refused but Salunke compelled him to join.

They both sat in front of a red, round shaped table.

All the memories about the past, the pranks, the laughs, everything was flashing in front of his eyes. His heart felt heavy as a stone. The silence was broken by a boy in black uniform. Salunke asked Azhar as to what he would like to have. Azhar looked at the boy with innocence and doubt in his eyes, then he moved his gaze towards Salunke. With trembling hands he reached for his bag and took out a long, thin glass out of it. It was the glass they used at the tea shop. Salunke was confused and asked Azhar for what it is.

In a low voice, he replied, “I could not afford an expensive gift for you, neither I had enough money to buy something suitable; so I thought I would gift you this cup which is going to remind you of our childhood memories and the place where we first met. Here take it. This, my friend, is a cup of friendship.”


They never met again.




Tuesday, September 10, 2013

काश इन्सान समझ पाता .




एक परिंदा नीले आसमान में,
पंख फैलाए,
देखता है धरती की ओर,
इस सोच में की,
कितना घिनौना है ये इंसान।

क्यों लड़ता है ये ,
मरता है ,
काले और गोरे के फर्क पर,
बड़े और छोटे के तर्क पर,
धर्म पर,
जात पर, रोता है,
अपने ही बनाये हालात पर।

रंग रूप,
कद काठी,
जो है कुदरत का दिया हुआ,
उस पर भी क्यों इतना इसने,
अभिमान है किया हुआ?

इतने में,
आदमी  ने उपर की ओर देखा,
परिंदा डरा,
और,
कही दूर उड़ चला,
उड़ते परिंदे को देख, आदमी बोला ,
क्या खूब,
कितना सुन्दर है ये परिंदा।

काश वो समझ पाता। 

Monday, March 4, 2013

Carpe Diem-Seize The Day

Couple of days back I saw a movie named “dead poets society” from which I took this quote ‘carpe diem.’
Although I did not like the movie much but the overall concept of the movie was interesting. It was
about how our education system is creating machines and not human beings and how we all need a
push to just be ‘ourselves’ and live our dreams.

Unlike many other college graduates, I chose for me a totally different path; working here at
Government schools of a village as a Gandhi Fellow. I will not say that I am working here to bring a
change in the society because I never thought about doing such work in past. But I can very strongly
say that I am here searching for the answer to a very important question,i.e., who am I?

And this is not probably because I am working here, but just because I am doing something which I
want to do. I agree that we all want a comfortable life, decent salary package, etc, but is it fair to
sacrifice your own self, your aspirations and your desires; to learn and to explore, and just get a
degree by studying something you are least interested in? You spend years of your grad in misery,
always asking yourself why exactly you are doing it and maybe, the answer is an obvious one- to
survive in this fast-paced world that that is possible only with academics. But is it, really?
I wonder why choosing a not-so-common path for your life has become a taboo. Why parents think
their children are not smart enough to think wisely for their future?
We all want our children to live with morals, like helping others, staying away from bad deeds and all
that theoretical shit. But when I am working here and finding it satisfying to help underprivileged
children of Government schools in getting what they deserve, then why on this holy planet should I
think about studying further so as to get a degree? or find a good job? Why is money becoming
everything for everyone? Obviously I do not deny that money plays an important role in our lives,
but there are hell lot of things which matter a lot than this piece of paper.
Learning about your own self, about the world you live in, finding answers about yourself is, I
believe, much bigger a thing. And that is what I am getting by choosing a ‘different’ path. What’s
frustrating is when, at times, you can’t convince others about it.

This is the first time I’m writing and this is just an effort to put my point and thoughts forward.

The second most frustrating thing for me is when people want you to believe blindly in an invisible
thing called GOD. And when you say that you don’t believe in his existence, I wonder why others
think that we are from an immature generation. They just don’t understand that we do not want to
follow blindly what our parents told us. Instead, we want to follow what we really believe in. Also,
not believing in God does not mean that there is god but I reject to believe in him, but it means that
I do not believe that there is something called God, at all.

I respect all the historical characters like Rama, Shiva etc, and I also respect books like Gita, Quran
etc. Also I have been reading philosophy lately and have started reading Quran. But it does not mean
that I have started believing in God. I would rather choose to follow what we learn from these
characters and books.

Unfortunately, maximum no. of people are just busy praying and singing and banging their heads in
front of these idols, something that I may call ‘blind following’. I think rather than doing this, they
should follow the real teachings of these characters.

For example, I hear these lines in Punjabi “awwal allah nooh upaya kudrat ke sab bande, ek noor se
sab jag upjeya kaun bhale kaun mande”. I don’t know the exact meaning of these lines but I
definitely know what their essence is. It says that this whole world has been created out of one
consciousness or energy and that everyone is equal. I wonder how many of us really follow it. Accept
the sad reality that we all differentiate on the basis of caste, religion, etc.

There are just so many examples I can give but I would rather keep it for the future because I know I
need to sit down, take help from others, articulate my thoughts in much better way. Then I would
love to write much more than this because while I am planning to finish this, I somewhere feel that I
have not expressed everything that I wanted to just because this is the first time I’m typing down my
views.

Before ending it, I would like to raise the last point about ‘Dharm Gurus’ or whatever these people
are called. I believe in the power of meditation and in single consciousness and I have my own
definition of God. I also read numerous spiritual and philosophical writings by different people but I
just don’t start following them blindly. We all have the capability to attain spiritual enlightenment
and to be more precise, in my view we all are God; we all have the capability to become a similar
entity.

I would like to conclude by sharing a line by Osho, “ never believe in a teacher or master if he
expects you to be his slave or follower because you can also become a master someday”

Om, omkar, amen!

I know there are people much more smarter than me. Thus, even if you don’t agree with my opinion,
please send me a feedback. I would really appreciate it. For parents, I’d suggest them to let their
children seize their lives and have faith in them. Friends, let’s make this generation an example of
change, to bring a change in the thousand-year old blindly followed thoughts and conditioning.

THANKS TO SAURABH SAHNI FOR EDITING :)

Sunday, October 14, 2012

First Love Is First Love...

A few days back, during the debrief session everyone laughed on one dialogue of my fellow mate sachin shewale which was " pehla pyaar to pehla pyaar hota hai "... obviously he was talking about me and my first love.

Yes, even i found my first love in fellowship like others but the only difference was that it was not some girl. He was talking about my school ek GUPS DEVIPURA BANI.

This is the place where i spent one month of my life working as a teacher, where i started my wsi journey in fellowship. This is the place where i did my village immersion and had lots of bitter and sweet memories.  Dilemma is that now i cannot continue my "Field Support" in that school because it has now turned into a secondary school. MY BAD.

I got this news in middle of the same debrief session and i felt cheated. Suddenly, faces of all the children in that school started to flash in my mind and i realised how much i was attached to them. Those smiles, those eyes, those little angles and devils making noise whenever they used to see me coming. I felt as if i have lost something really close to my heart, i felt like crying.

Sometimes you don't even realise how special a few people or things are in your life until and unless you are separated from them. EVEN I DID'NT.

I wanted to do something for those kids, i wanted to tell how much i loved them, i wanted to get some more time, i wanted to work there. BUT UNFORTUNATELY I COULD NOT.

I still get goosebumps when i think about some children who were really close to my heart. Those few special kids who really deserved some appreciation and boost, who really wanted me to help them, i can see their eyes haunting me...as if i have betrayed them...given them false hopes and then ran away :(

SO, i visited this school just to tell all those lovely kids how much i loved them and how much i will miss them. All of them started jumping and shouting because they were excited to see me after such a long time but they did not know why i was there and what i was going to tell them.

I went to each and every class starting from first and second. Little kids came and sat close to me and asked me to sing a song for them...i didn't...i told them that it was my last day and that i have just come here to say goodbye...it was overwhelming to see that those little kids understood what i was saying and they wanted me not to leave. SOMETHING MOVED INSIDE ME :(

Then i went to all the sections one by one, some of the kids were laughing ( not there fault, they are just kids )..but i could feel how much they loved me...how there smiling faces turned serious when i told them about me not coming to school again...i could not dare to see into there eyes...THOSE SILENT QUESTIONS...

I felt like someone was pinning my heart slowly...manoj, ronak, ujjwal, ankit, nirma, poonam, 8th standard boys, that tall girl, and so many special kids...they all were asking the same question with silent eyes..WHY?

And they took my number ( i know they will never call ),...but still it was special cuz it showed how much they love me...AND I LOVE THEM TOO :)

no matter where i am working, no matter how busy i am, i will still try to visit that school again and again...A PROMISE TO THEM :)

And i left from there...with heavy heart...couldn't stop the tears to come out...JUST SMILED AND WAVED A GOODBYE <3